I DON'T ASK FOR MUCH....

I just can't believe its got to this point. Next month, I turn 25. W H A T. I don't understand, why do I still feel 16? How am I still living at home? Why do I feel EXACTLY the same as I did when I was 18?! How is it, that I suddenly feel I should be finding the man of my dreams to marry and make babies with? When did it happen that I became a woman who bought things like stamps, car insurance and B12 vitamins? 25 is the year you're apparently supposed to start looking at anti ageing skin care and worrying about things like smear tests *shudder*. WHY.  I'm not being funny but, it literally feels like I was saving my EMA money for Topshop clothes and drinking £3.99 Tesco Value box wine in Castle Park, just last week.. 

SIGH. Alas, I'm trying to be positive about the whole, hitting the ripe old age of 25, thing. I mean, I'm not 30 quite yet (mid life crisis anyone?), and I feel like 25-30 may just be my time, to begin walking a little faster through that that thing we call a 'career path', and actually move on, up and OUT of my family home. Heres to hoping ay! 

I thought I'd put together a little wish list of mine to refer back to. I usually get money for my birthday, and instead of spending it on Nando's and lipstick colours I already have, I thought I could remind myself of the things I really want to invest in this year! (All items linked within my words!)

How cool is this Zara Tshirt? I feel like it sums up myself, and maybe most other women in 2017? 

Camera equipment (Instax Poleroid, Canon 80D, Go Pro Hero 4), is something I've wanted for so. very. long. I mean, this is like the top of the range stuff I'd get if I won some money or something, but ultimately I just want a decent camera I can learn with and take my photography/videography love to the next level. 

The Ordinary Skincare is something I've seen floating around for a while now, I'm really intrigued by it considering it claims to be very natural and seems to be a big hit with in the blogosphere. I've seen a lot about the benefits of vitamin C so I'd be really interested to try The Ordinary Vitamin C Serum.

All I want, are some black, chunky, COMFY sandals. The only ones I've found, and liked so far, and the Dr Martens Gryphon ones. 

I'm planning to redecorate my room this year (I'm slowly but surely getting there), three things I desperately need are some Prints for the walls, A bedside table lamp, and a rug. 

I live in trainers, so investing in a new pair is definitely on my to do list! I love these Reebok Classics with the gum soul. 

A cute Zara sale dress, just because.

Me and Christina saw this mens Nike vest the other day, I put it against myself and realised I could definitly get away with it as a tshirt (vest?) dress. Pair it with some boots or converse and you got a go to Madi outfit right there. 

As previously mentioned, eye creams are something I've been giving my time to. The Kiehls Avacado Eye Treatment sounds like it might just be a hit with me and its on my 'To Try' list for sure.

I saw this L'oreal Gel Moisturiser in Boots the other day, I find every time I wear my cream moisturiser lately I ALWAYS end up with spots at the end of the day/the day after, and when I opt to give it a rest for the day, I don't? Laura Lee taught me that gel moisturisers are better for this problem. This also has Aloe Vera in and smells amazing so would love to try also!

Zara gift card - self explanatory. I'm loving Zara this year, basically. 

I used to LIVE in Black and White converse, its been so long since I've had some and they're such an easy shoe to wear/style. 

I'm really enjoying reading lately, sometimes I find an hour or two will go by when I'm getting lost in a book which is rare for my constantly buzzing mind. I've seen a lot about the 'Reasons to Stay Alive' book by Matt Haig. With mental health so close to my heart, I'd love to give this a gander.

Maybe the thing I'm MOST EXCITED ABOUT, Anastasia Beverly Hills announced this morning that they're releasing a new palette RIGHT BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY. (Check out their Instagram for more campaign shots) I feel like its the first palette I've EVER seen that has not one colour I wouldn't wear. 

Tea Pigs Pic'n'Mix set! After snooping Christina's sisters Instagram, I've been lusting after this little set ever since. If you know me you'll know I love my herbal teas. Tea Pigs is a brand I have't tried before so would love to give them a taste.

Ahhhh another beautiful March Jacobs Watch. I already have a really minimal watch by Marc with a white face and its a little more dainty. I love love love the black clock face and general design of this watch. Please? Anyone?

AND FINALLY - A trip to Edinburgh. This is something I've wanted to do for soooo long. Me and Christina (of course), are planning to book a 3 night stay there as soon as we next get paid and I can't bloody well wait.

Hope you enjoyed having a gander at my somewhat gigantic lust list! 

Let me know if you know of any good camera models that would be good for starting off with. As well as any good skincare/books/places to visit in Edinburgh. Anything really! Always down for a chat me! 

Thanks for reading, as always,

Madi x

EVERYDAY MAKEUP

Its been a while since I've really given time, thought and energy into my makeup routine, or makeup in general for that matter. This time a couple years back I was a girl OBSESSED, with all things makeup & cosmetics. After leaving my job at Mac in 2016, I've just seemed to have lost all passion and love for it. Which is a shame, because I do still believe I'm good at makeup artistry when I want to be, and I still have urges to do other peoples makeup/offer them advice etc, all the time. I've been wanting to do a little round up of all my daily essentials for a while now, I love reading these type of posts so thought I'd create my own!  

BASE:

I would be lying if I told you my base didn't change on a pretty regular basis. I don't know about you, but I'm never quite happy with the finish of foundations that I try. No matter if I spend under £10 or over £30 I still haven't quite mastered the perfect finish. However..

• After my SKINCARE ROUTINE, I will spot conceal, with the new Lasting Perfection GREEN, colour correcting concealer, to get rid of any stubborn redness. I find this can give a slightly ghostly/chalky effect when blended - which I suppose is because my true pale form is visible once the redness is gone!
• I will use a MAC 159 brush to apply my foundation. I'm currently using L'oreal Infallible, 'Stay Fresh Foundation' - which claims to provide '24 hour wear, SPF18, No transfer, No visible imperfections, No visible shine, No dry out, No mask effect.' The bits I've crossed through, I unfortunately have to say I don't agree with. I find this foundation quite thick and heavy on the skin, however I do love the coverage it provides. I love the fact it looks very radiant and the way it doesn't dry out, I just wish it wasn't so thick/doesn't stay put for very long.
• After foundation I will use my faveeee concealer, Lasting Perfection Concealer from Collection, in the shade Fair 1. I use a fair bit of this around my (unfortunately baggy) eyes, and to conceal any blemishes I got going on that day. 
• SET T-ZONE - I usually don't go too overkill with the powdering/setting step as I don't like the look of my skin when its too matte. My favourite powder to use at the minute is an old favourite, Rimmel London Stay Matte, in shade 001 Transparent.  
• Next I'll use the NARS Laguna Bronzer to warm up my face with a real techniques blush brush. This bronzer has been a holy grail of mine for actual years. I also swear to god one of these will last me around a year, maybe more. (is that gross? meh)
• Then I will contour with the Anastasia Beverly Hills powder contour kit, to give some depth to my face and make my cheek bones really pop. I love using the lightest, dark shade first, and then finish contouring by adding some of the darkest shade nearest my ears/outter.. face?
• Next I will highlight- my favourite highlighter at the minute is actually the Goddess of Love Triple Baked Highlighter from I heart Makeup, (not photographed as it didn't match my OCD flatlay standards, lawl). I find it matches up as such a good dupe for the Mac Mineralised highlight in Soft and Gentle. Made with a blend of beautiful golds, pearls, and pinks, it would be perfect for all skin tones. (*highlight chat drool*)(btw its only £4.99, wtf?)
• To finish my base, and depending on my mood, I'll add some blush. My two favourites to use are Mac Warm Soul and NARS Torrid. 

EYES:

My eye makeup usually stays pretty simple on a day to day basis. Its only on a day off or a night out that I'll really go to town with eyeshadow/eyeliner etc. Plus, considering the fact I wear glasses, I find a lot of eye makeup can look a bit strange/much when I'm sporting my somewhat, chunky frames. 

• I. fucking. hate. drawing. on. my. eyebrows. I am literally one of the laziest people ever. So the fact I HAVE to draw my eyebrows on everyday to look relatively normal/alive is a pain in the bum hole (not literally, that would be weird). I know I could get them tattooed or micro-bladed etc but lets just say, I'm still kind of building up the courage to get such permanent changes carried out. For my eyebrows I use the Anastasia Beverly Hills eyebrow  Dipbrow Promade in the shade Auburn & Duo Brush (#7B). I'm only just on my second one of these after TWO YEARS and I use it every day. (again, is that gross? meh)
• Any cleaning up and extra brightening around my eye balls will take place next. Again, I will use the Lasting Perfection concealer to carve out my brows and the Prep & Prime highlighter in Light Boost on any dark circles. 
• Next I will highlight my brow bone/inner corners with Mac eyeshadow in Nylon. (AMAZING for highlighting these areas)
• 9/10 I will just be wearing mascarra on my eyelashes, so for this I use a mixture of L'oreal Paris Miss Manga Punk, Mega Volume macarra for the thickness & volume, and to seperate/get rid of any clumps I use an unamed Rimmel London mascarra (packaging has rubbed off!). If I want to be a little extra I might use a smidgen of Mac Paint Pot in Groundwork on my lids and under my lower lash line. 

LIPS & FINISH:

I used to be such a bright/dark lip kinda gal, there was not usually a day that went by where I wasn't wearing a dark berry tone or a bright purple lip. I almost feel its as though I have finally found the right nudes that suit me. Its super hard to find a nude that looks right when it comes to having pale skin and ginger hair. Anything slightly peached toned makes me look unwell, and anything too light makes me look even more unwell!   

LIPSTICK FAVES IN ORDER:

• #1 - MAC, Stone with MAC Stone lipliner. My one and only true love. I think this is my third bullet of Stone. I absolutely love everything about this lipstick. The tone seems to make my skin appear more flawless, my hair appear more vibrant, and my eyes more blue. Theres just something about it. 
• #2 - MUA, Velvet Matte Lipstick in #six with NYX Nude Truffle lipliner. A newly discovered combo. I feel like I have nothing like the colour of the new MUA lipstick. There range is absolutely banging in Superdrug, and they're only £3 a go! Highly recommend checking them out. Just make sure you've moisturised your lips before as they can be a tad dry. I might do a review post on them as I have recently purchased a few for myself, let me know if thats something you'd like to see.   
• #3 - NYX, Lip Lingerie in Corset with MAC Cork lipliner. Perfect for that fake lip filler illusion. I usually opt for this combo on a night out or if I need to distract attention from my eyes - aka I'm really hungover/tired. 

I'd love to know if you guys have any recommendations on any pale foundations! I'm looking for something with a satin finish, a good coverage and a nice pale/creamy colour. I find it really hard to not end up with something TOO pale/chalky or too pink toned. 

Thanks for reading, as always!

Madi x

15 PERSONAL GET TO KNOW ME QUESTIONS

Ok so I'm getting frustrated. I'm also relating a lot to Alice, over at THE ALICE EDIT, what with her recently carried out knee operation and being house bound. There are SO many blog posts I have lined up that I want to write, I just don't have the photos to go with them! If you haven't guessed already, and without sounding too self obsessed here, the photos I have planned would be of me, or include me. After all this is my personal blog, so it would be nice if I could make it more personal in the way of creative self portraits/photography and of course outfit posts etc. 

Anyway, I thought I'd do a personal question tag, (the more personal, the more juicy, right?). I've seen things like this floating around on the Blogosphere for a while now so thought I'd give it a go - plus I don't really have too much else to write about for now, at least until I can get some photos done! (I started my new medication today, eee all fingers and toes crossed that it kicks in ASAP!). 

If you had my on Myspace, or even Facebook, way back when in 2007, you'll know I'm a big fan of a question tag ;) I can't promise this will be too interesting but I hope you are some what entertained anyway!

1. Where did you grow up? What was it like?

I was born and grew up in none other, than good old Bristol. I've always loved the city I live in. Growing up here was a whirlwind of excitement, drinking underage, and meeting tonnes of new people. Bristol is a good mix of professionalism and play & sophistication and creativity. I love the fact its big enough for plenty of adventure but small enough to feel safe.

2. Who do you admire the most right now?

Probably my friends. I look up to every single one of them. I always feel as though they are continuously achieving things and excelling in life. Also lots of other freelance bloggers/writers that I subtly envy, and people who have enough guts and passion to start up their own business'! 

3. How'd you meet your best friend?

We met at my first ever job, in a shop called Espirt. She was one of the only friendly faces that asked for my contact details and made me feel super welcome. It's crazy how close we are now considering we met in a work environment!

4. Whats the most important thing in your life right now?

Without a doubt, my physical and mental health. I'm hopefully on the road to recovery once more and its feeling good!

5. How do you express yourself romantically?

I like to describe myself as a slow burner, but once I'm a-light, boy do you know it. I take my time in finding out where my feelings are going with a person. If I like someone, they won't know it straight away. It takes me a good while to feel comfortable with showing my emotion and feelings. However, once I start to like someone, I involve myself in that person a lot. Maybe too much. 

6. What was your most embarrassing moment?

I'm sure there are a trillion that I can't remember but, I do specifically remember the one time one of my ex's announced to his whole family, that I'd been for a poo (I had), because I'd taken a long time in the bathroom. Cheers pal. More recently me and my friend were bidding farewell to some boys we met in a club, and they watched me fall down the stairs as they waved us off... yup. 

7. Whats your pet peev?

People who don't wear cycle helmets when they cycle on the road, or anywhere for that matter. People who tap. The general public. Late doctors appointments. Waiting for prescriptions. Out of date soya milk. When everyones eating cheese and I can't. Sweaty/clammy, naked cuddles. The feeling of being rained on. Bad weather on holiday. Uncomfy clothing... to name a few. 

8. What do you notice first in a person?

Probably their stature/general presence. Which sounds really weird, but I think I judge someone a lot by their body language - whether it be closed, open, slouched or proud. If they walk hunched or tall and if they make eye contact with me/attempt to make conversation or not. Aesthetic wise it's probably height & eyes in a man and makeup & skin on a woman (the things I would envy, lawl). 

9.  Whats a song that moved you to feel something?

Paolo Nutini - Loving You, reminds me of falling in love for the first time.

Maccabees - Toothpaste Kisses, reminds me of falling in lust for the first time.

Alt J - Every Other Freckle, reminds me of being in love.

Birdy - Light Me Up, reminds me of falling out of love and being interested in someone new.

Dua Lipa - New Rules, reminds me of 2016.

Naughty Boy - La La La, reminds me of the best Summer of my life so far (2013).

Of course there are a shit tonne more but, there ya go!

10. What random topic do you enjoy discussing?

Boys. No matter how much I try and detract myself away from the male species, they ALWAYS seem to crop up in topic of conversation. Whether it be memories or hes 'been a massive twat' or 'gave the best orgasm', there always seems to be something that provokes emotion and passion when it comes to boys. I think both me and my closest friends, can agree on the fact we just love talking about boys and their mystical, bellendish, wonderful ways. 

11. Whats your favourite thing to buy?

Well obviously that would without a doubt be food. A good Nando's or a tasty Waga's - you got me at 'Shall we get food?'. Second to that would probably be makeup or toiletries, I'm pretty sure Boots and Superdrug should know my name by now. 

12. What do you hope to grow out of?

I really hope to grow out of my lack of organisation and untidyness. I feel like I'm really good at initially organising myself, whether it be for a new job, a weekend away, making my room tidy, or even a night out. Yet I always end up in chaos. I seem to just lose all concept of keeping myself in check and remembering how maintaining organisation, will make the task in hand easier in the long run. (You should see my pants & socks drawers..)

13. What impression do you try to give when you first meet them?

What I try to give and what I actually portray seem to be pretty different. I think it also depends what mood I'm in. Sometimes I think I can appear pretty stand offish and shy/rude, not that I mean to be! Sometimes I'm shy and quiet Madi, and other times I'm loud, friendly, welcoming Madi. How comfortable I am in a situation usually determines which Madi I'll be that day/evening! Overall I'm a pretty friendly gal that will talk to anyone if I feel confident enough to do so. 

14. What are some things you'd like to achieve before you die?

I want to travel to as many places as possible. I don't mean travel with a backpack and see the world in a more rural and organic way (As much as I wish I could be that girl). More so that I want to have as many holidays as I can (heh). Ya girl can't deal with not having a wash or eating nice food for over 48 hours.  

15. Whats the best and worst part of your personality?

The best - I'm pretty loyal when it comes to friendships and relationships. If I'm in your life, I'm very much in your life. When I'm sad, I find I can always bring myself around in one way or another, sometimes it takes longer than others, but on the whole I'm pretty good at self healing. I like to think of myself as pretty fun, I'm always up for something new/different and I'm always wanting to experience and see new things. I'm also incredibly loving when it comes to the right people. 

The worst - I'm a pretty intense person I guess. If I get on with a certain person, I will cling to them. I'm a very personable person, I like to find out the ins and outs of that person and be by their side through pretty much everything - that goes for friendships as well as relationships! My decisions are also usually swayed by someone I admire or like, which annoys me, as I sometimes don't stand for what I want and get influenced by others! 

Phew!

Well done if you actually read that, you must be pretty nosy. (like me, don't worry ;))

I hope you enjoyed this little random post. Heres to hoping from this month my blog will start to take a turn for the more creative and exciting! PS, I kinda made this tag up myself out of a mixture of tag questions I found online - feel free to answer the questions and blog about them yourself! Tag me in them if you do. 

Thanks for reading, as always!

Madi x

JUNE ROUNDUP

June... June, June, June. To be fair, I don't really know how to start this blog post. There I was, thinking June would be the month that everything turns around. June usually brings the times where my life seems to improve by around 5 notches, on a scale of 1-10, at least. Summer is on the way, my skin starts to clear up, everyones in good spirits, but no. Not this year buddy.
June's been awful for me to say the least. I've been off sick from work the entire month, which builds up tremendous feelings of guilt, anxiety and worry due to letting all my colleagues down and generally being a part of the non working life. HOWEVER, I am starting to see a small light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm currently sat in a coffee shop, sipping a soya hot chocolate, and watching the random spells of rain we've been having on and off for the past 3 hours, meanwhile, slightly sweating because the temperature is still humid AF. Anyway, today is the day I decided to actually come out of my little hell hole, of being too sore to wash or move, and get some shit done. I've just come from seeing my doctor, for the 3rd time in the past 4 weeks. She is SO kind and pays such an interest in my life, whether it be my home life, my work, my family and of course, my health. I feel so fortunate to have such positive beings in my life at such a hard time. *Praising hands emoji*. I also want to mention how lovely people have been this month about my blog, its so nice to see people actually reading my content and commenting on the way I write etc. It means so much to me, so thank you!

ANYWAY, on to the limited things I've been up to this month...

EATING WELL & LOOKING AFTER ONESELF

Whenever I get unwell, I tend to go into a frenzy of eating well, sleeping well, feeding my brain and body with all the best things I can. Mainly because I have the time I guess? It is hard to eat healthy and drink the right amount of water every day, but I'm doing pretty well so far. I've avoided dairy for the entire month and I'm eating more fruit and veg than ever. Can't be bad, right?

THANK GOD FOR THE NATIONAL TRUST

I've spent a good portion of this month exploring different National Trust parks, and of course my beloved Westonbirt. I find I can really have a break from everything when I go to such places. Theres never usually much signal on your phone, and your problems seem a little smaller, even if just for a couple of hours. I'm going to put a post up all about Dyrham Park, which is the closest park to Bristol and the place where me and my friend Christina ended up actually signing up for a yearly membership. Heres to a year full of adventure, free parking, and nature!

FOOD AND SILLINESS 

Theres one thing that has occupied my time this month - eating. I'm so glad that I find so much joy in eating. Whenever I'm eating, I swear I think about nothing else but whats going on in my mouth (lol). I feel like its a blessing that no matter whats wrong with me in life, I will always find the time to eat. I've also spent time with some of my closest friends, which always makes me feel better. Sometimes you feel as though the last thing you want to do is to see people when you're feeling so shite, but once I'm forced out of bed to get dressed, maybe put some eyebrows on, and meet my friends, it always makes me feel 110% more productive and happy once I come home. I'm made to feel like they don't judge me for the way I look or if I'm acting a bit off/anxious that day, they just try their best to make me laugh and smile. I'm so thankful <3 

WOULD IT BE MADELEIINE GRACE BLOGS IF THERE WAS NO DOG WALK PHOTOS?

Its actually been pretty hot this month, shock horror. We are ACTUALLY having decent weather in the middle of Summer?! This means I've been taking Theo out either really early in the morning, or later in the evening, considering he's a black dog with a tonne of curly locks, he gets so hot just wondering around the house during the highest temperatures of the day. I continue to express how much joy my little pupper brings me. Hes like my left arm at the moment considering I'm home so much. He follows me everywhere and always jumps onto my bed every morning for an after poo snooze. Bless his little poodle soul. 

THINKING, PLANNING, RESTING

Majority of my time this month has been spent doing a lot of thinking & planning. I've been researching a lot into the medication I'm about to take (this timex next week! eek!), and a little bit more about the biology behind my problem etc. Its been interesting, I guess. I've also been thinking a lot about my 25th birthday in August, as well as my Step Sisters Babyshower (which I cannot confirm the date, place, time, or theme on here, as I know she reads my blog - soz). I've been planning little DIY projects I can get stuck into, meanwhile trying to not go out of my mind with the lack of routine and human interaction, lawl. I feel like this post was a little short in comparison to my others, which annoys me as I wanted this year to be jam packed with adventure and plans! Hey ho, hers to the next month where things hopefully start to turn a corner. Hope you've had an amazing June and enjoyed all the glorious weather we've been having! 

PS - If there are any other Bristol/Cardiff/South West bloggers that read my blog, please feel free to get in contact! I'm longing for some blogging friends and to plan future posts for my blog, with the extra help of outfit photographers etc!

Thanks for reading, as always, Madi x