Wednesday, 6 December 2017


Before writing this post, I already know people will be thinking, 'God Madi, get over it, you were only in London for two weeks', 'Madi, it's not that big a deal, you only did a two week placement in London'... etc etc. I really hate that part of blogging/social media/the online world. Why do we all make fun of each other so much? All the screen shots of bad eyebrows, bad outfits and soppy couples we've all put on the group chat at some point. We're all so quick to judge, and its sad. Its one of the main reasons I truly deem myself as an 'anxious blogger', (I just made that up). Sometimes I get so worried about what people will think of what I'm writing about or photos I want to share, I just don't share anything at all. Stupid isn't it? We all like different things, we all want to share different things, some of us want to share a lot, some of us nothing at all. I guess at least I know that some people are genuinely interested in the stuff that I share. So fuck it! Here's a little about my trip to London the past couple weeks..

{Some Houses by Jenny's flat}

Ok so background info: So as you may or may not know, I have a degree in Fashion Promotion and I've always aspired to do the best I possibly can when it comes to my education & career. The only thing thats got in my way is mental health, and physical health. If it wasn't for my sometimes crippling depression and anxiety, and my sometimes debilitating illness - I have no doubt that I'd be a little further advanced in my career level than I currently am right now. 
Alas, I decided to try and push myself this year, after a break up that left me feeling rock bottom about myself, and a bout of illness that left me feeling pretty useless in general - I decided to send a few emails around and try my luck at getting my first ever placement in London. (Don't ask, don't get and all that).

I was really lucky to be able to stay at my friend Jenny's flat, as she is currently a live out Nanny in Islington. The area Jenny lives in is really accessable to the destinations I needed in London (ie - Central/Victoria), so it was pretty easy for me to figure out my commute and only took around 25 minutes one way for me to get to the office. Before I left for London I can't even begin to explain to you how anxious and nervous I really was. I was just super worried about getting around, and I get really worried about getting hurt/being unsafe in over crowded places, especially at this time of year - can't really blame me what with some of the news this year. Ironically, on my first day the tube station by Jenny's flat was actually closed, and there were 'emergency response' workers outside, meaning I had to get the bus. (Luckily I left around 1.5 hours early for the start of my day during the first couple days, incase of such incidences). (I arrived a whole hour early one day). (lol).

{Amazing lights in Oxford Circus and Soho}

My general day to day, included two tubes, lots of people, lots of awkward eye contact and potentially flirtatious side smiles. Followed by a green tea in the office's cafe considering I was usually early. I would then go up into the office and experience my first taste into Fashion PR work and what it really involves. Lots of important emails and phone calls? correct. Lots of making connections with brands, editors, and journalists, while being surrounded by glossy magazines? correct. Sounds glamorous right? Some of the days me and the Fashion comms assistant would go back and forth to the Oxford Street store carrying hangers or samples, we'd personally wrap PR packages to send to bloggers, and one of the days I helped to undress some of Christmas tree's. It was all very varied - which I loved!

{Me and Jenny went for dinner on the roof top garden above John Lewis Oxford Street - although a bit chilly, absolutely stunning food and definitely made me feel at least a little festive (I'm not sure why but I'm a bit of a bah humbug this year!} 

I really really enjoyed my time as an intern. It was much more hard work than I expected, mainly because a lot of physical work was involved, what with a shit tonne of PR samples to sort through, vans to load, cages to push, but it was all work I was used to doing with my current job as a Merchandiser, so as the days rolled by I actually felt more and more confident with this potential London PR girl work/life scenario I was immersing myself in. Some days I was sent to get lunch or coffee's for the team, other times to drop off some dry cleaning or pick up more glossy magazines - I actually loved this part! It meant I got to go on a little solo adventure to source whatever I was told to get. Whether it was sushi from the local Waitrose, or magazines from Selfridges - The intrigued explorer with in me was more than game to set up my google maps and face the challenge of navigating the busy streets of Central London.

{Beautiful Oxford Street Christmas lights}

I feel like Fashion Internships are something that aren't talked about much on the internet. You're just expected to do them if you want to get somewhere when it comes to the world of fashun. They're predominantly unpaid, and it's said that you are usually over worked and under appreciated. I won't lie to you, I was exhausted after the two weeks I volunteered myself. The first week I was there was the launch of the long awaited Christmas Advert (which was super cool to see behind the scenes/commercial work that goes into it), and the second week was the SS18 Press Show. I met a couple of big magazine editors, bumped into Mary Portas and got to see new releases before anyone else. All. very. cool. Now I've worked within PR, I know that its something I would definitely be interested in as a career, and after all, thats the reasons you should be doing internships/placements etc. I spoke to a few people in the head office and found myself saying 'I just don't really know what I want to do yet', and a lot of them responded, 'Well thats a good thing! You get to explore whatever you want'. (I still wish I was a self assured aspiring Investment Banker to bring in that sweet dolla, but hey ho #creativeprobs)

{Some lovely London architecture - you know I love me some beautiful buildings}

I think as a generation we're so pressurised into thinking whats wrong and right for a career. I constantly feel pressurised to earn more money to be able to invest in property etc. Which I completely get, and ultimately thats the goal, however I need to remember that if I worked in a city or a company/job role that didn't feed my soul and make me feel excited and inspired - I'd crash and burn. I think the internship I did was a long time coming. I was struggling here in Bristol with my mood and general mental health, I think everyone tends to come to times in their lives sometimes where they feel they've hit a brick wall. I can't stand the monotonous routine of doing something thats not giving my life the best and most motivating impact it possibly can. Why would I want to use my energy on something that I don't feel is benefiting my life or making me happy?


London gave me the feeling I got when I was back at uni. That feeling of rushing around, getting a train here, driving there, doing this project and that project, and putting my all into everything I did. London excited me and challenged me in more ways than one. I completely get why Londoner's say they could never leave. As tourists we see busy streets and stuffy tubes and bright and over whelming shops. However, I saw a different side of London this time around, considering I spent more than just a day/long weekend there. (and I wasn't there just to shop).

{The best cookie I've ever tasted from a Vegan market me and my friend Jenny went to one weekend - Me feeling slightly sassy in my all black attire (and a massive head apparently)}

My time away from home/Bristol gave me a time to have my own head space, to focus on portraying myself in the best way possible and absorbing as much information as I could. In three words - Fun, Interesting, Missedmybed. I would urge anyone to try an internship in London if you get the chance, and really take the opportunity and run with it. Every task I was given I tried my very best, if it was to scan some magazines, I did it as fast as I could. If it was to put together a coverage report or competitor research, I made sure it was as neat and informative as possible. I almost feel as though I got my 'mojo' back when I went to London.
After a year of being emotionally drained by a tough relationship, a sometimes tough home life, and a general stunt in my motivation, it was nice to go back to feeling like the old me again - immersing myself in creativity, learning new things and exploring new places - my fave things ever.

{This day I had the day to myself as my friend and her flat mate were both busy - I did want to go out and explore some places but over thinking got the better of me, so I ended up making myself a big comforting breakfast and exploring the local area instead!}

I'm not sure where I'll go next when it comes to my career goals. I'm the sort of person that has to take the time to really absorb new information/experiences and reflect on it once I've had some time. I'm just so proud and excited that I finally did it. All by myself. Worked in London, in the Fashion industry. Something that sounds so easy and laughable to some, but a huge achievement for me.

{Till next time London! - Can we just acknowledge how b u s y Paddington station was on my Friday evening depart, I literally nearly got stampeeded over with my massive suitcase. (I did get a seat on the train though yaaas)}

Anyway, well done if you got through that mammoth of blabble & thanks for reading!
Madi x