Wednesday 8 March 2017

IWD

Today is International Women's day. I've been thinking about doing this blog post for a while, but today it seems most appropriate. First of all - I love being a girl, but its hard. Really hard - but we all know that. What with periods, mood swings, the lack of choice in decent men, having to be the one to carry and birth a baby, stupid dating apps that make us want to die, skincare, what clothes will make our assets look the nicest, our hair, our toenails, having to shave our hairy legs & foof. I could honestly go on forever. (Ps I think thats the first time I've ever referred to a vagina as, a foof). Half of my days are spent wondering whether I should aspire to be a nature loving, free spirited feminist, or a self indulgent, materialistic, Instagram model.

My favourite part about being a women in 2017 is how strong we are perceived, recognised, and most importantly, are. I do agree that social media is a huge part of this. Women are standing forward when it comes to being a 'girl boss'. Girls are encouraged to take their passion or career path, and run with it. Whether it be writing about the make up we love, talking about our pregnancy journeys, becoming qualified builders and electricians, or becoming CEO. Gone are the days where women are confined to motherhood, or discouraged to use their brains for anything more than keeping a home. Girls are being brought up to stand up for themselves, never back down until they get what they want, and most importantly, continuously fight for the respect we always have and always will, deserve.


Okay, so lets talk about men. Who doesn't love men? Whether it be your dad, brother, dog, cousin, work friend, Tinder squeeze, boyfriend or husband. Men are the spice of life, the opposite sex. What would we do without strapping young lads or wise old men? Whether we like it or not, men make us feel good. Whether its helping us, spoiling us, flirting with us, or squeezing us and spinning us around, (one of my personal faves). However, (come on, of course theres a 'however), what really upsets me, is men with double standards, and worse - inflicting emotional and physical abuse, particularly when it comes to sexism.

Men who expect women to stay reserved and 'old fashioned', yet expect us to send nudes. Men who expect women to not dress in a certain way, yet deem it ok to pry, perv and pester, when a woman chooses otherwise. I've actually been pretty shocked at some remarks I've heard, aimed at women. To name a few, 'I would never date someone who isn't a virgin, damaged goods' or 'If I found out you'd slept with more people than me, I wouldn't date you. Trust me, ALL men think the same', but of course - its perfectly acceptable, almost disregarded, for us to date men who have been around the houses, and some. I feel extremely passionate when it comes to women and how/when we use our bodies. GUESS WHAT?! Sex feels great to us too! It baffles me as to how older generations STILL appear to think casual sexual partners, one night stands, and sex based relationships are 'disrespecting yourself' or 'letting a man use you'.
....But, what If we're 'using' them, just as much as they're 'using' us? Like I say, I could talk on this subject matter for an eternity.


I feel kinda sad for some of my friends in their 20's who still, in 2017, feel they can't freely talk about relationships/sex with their parents. I mean of course, some things are unheard of sharing. However, I believe now, more than ever, girls should be talking about sex - safe sex! Educating each other, and most importantly not made to feel ashamed for taking part in, and enjoying safe sex. Why is it that boys get 'get in their son', yet girls get a subtly shunned with derogatory remarks. What confuses me the most, is one minute girls are 'frigid' teenagers, made fun of in the playground for being a virgin. Then the next, they're made to feel unnecessarily ashamed, for carrying out an act, that on most occasions, is both pleasurable and empowering. I feel like as a society - views, feelings, emotions and attitudes towards sexism is still something we need to work on. I mean, isn't it kind of sad that most of the songs on the radio are about getting back at our ex's, how boys are all cheats, and how dying our hair blonde, would be a necessary action to take to get a boys attention/approval?! AND, whats with all the meme's/videos about 'needy' girlfriends, when all we're really doing is expressing our love in our own weird and wonderful ways?! Bring back the days of heartfelt mix tapes, love poems and romance, I say!

“A slut is someone, usually a woman, who’s stepped outside of the very narrow lane that good girls are supposed to stay within. Sluts are loud. We’re messy. We don’t behave. In fact, the original definition of “slut” meant “untidy woman.” But since we live in a world that relies on women to be tidy in all ways, to be quiet and obedient and agreeable and available (but never aggressive), those of us who colour outside of the lines get called sluts. And that word is meant to keep us in line.” 
― Jaclyn Friedman

Women - let us continue to be loud, messy, colourful, fierce, creative, wild, free, excitable and absolutely extraordinary. Keep growing your freelance business', keep bringing up amazing families, keep striving towards #goals, travel often, love often, and don't let men like Donald Trump make you think you are anything less, than absolutely FAB.


Thanks for reading, Madi x



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